i didnt go to sch in the end.
becos i decided that it was too damn lame to change n walk all the way there n back just to hand in a file.
so i'm gonna hand it up tml instead.

tml there's band!
and i'm not sure if there's council as well.
and i'm sure if i'm going out with the gers tml.
hahaha.

life's gonna get better.

hahaha.
i'm like, so damn nice.
i went band today.
unlike germaine, tsk tsk.

i really think he's too much.
he doesnt even get his facts right before making accusations.
i mean, what's your problem.
you're just making everything worse for me.
if you dont even understand then stay out of my affairs.

if you really like him then why not give it a try.
cos if you dont you'll regret anyway.
good luck.
=D

got back my report bk today.
i guess it's all right ba.
but i'm kinda disappointed la.
but it's damn no face when i got 21st and my cousin got 5th in class.
and then he's like, hao lian-ing the whole day.
gonna work harder next time.

i'm excited to watch X MEN III.
haha.
was asking jordon they all today.
then they say it's a MUST WATCH.
haha.
but i dont think over the hedge is a kid's show cans.

i hope she's alright ba.
but she seem to be doing ok to me.

band was like, so freaking crazy la.
mr ong made us stay back to talk to us.
and we stayed till like, 7.30pm eh.
so freaking late.
haha.
but it was freaking funny.
cos everyone was laughing and talking back to him.
then yanling keep asking
"can we go home now?"
hahaha.

our class girls WON!
whoos.
we're the champs.
=D

tml is the last day of sch.
weehee.

wahseh.
i got fever, headache, and flu.
that's a really bad omen.

chemistry suck la.
i scalded my hand.
i burnt my worksheet.
and i broke the crucible.

i dont know what's the big deal.
i mean, it just ONE simple s.p.a.
why such a big fuss.
i wasnt even being rude to you or anything.
are you trying to throw your authority around or what.

i know understand how ppl can stand to cut themselves.
its like, i accidentally cut my hand today.
and when i was bathing and the soap touched the wound,
i almost wanted to scream bloody murder.
if that was already so painful,
imagine the pain of a knife against the skin.

i seriously dont know what you're thinking.

wth!!!.
my tt one came 10 days early.
ARGH!

mr ong came to find me AGAIN!
i mean, like, doesnt he have better things to do.
and cant he look for germaine instead.
and can he at least train his speech before finding me.
becos i find it damn weird to be standing there and staring at each other in silence.

sectionals was ok ba.
quite slack.
then germaine (the foo, haha) was like having depression or something.
then she damn quiet throughout.
then me and germaine(this time is lee) kept talking and talking.
hahaha.

got back my combined marks le.
and it's like shit cans.
my percentage is damn low.
and i'm so gonna get freaking grounded.

my class is getting so EMO la.
haha.
so many ppl cried.

and it's been so freaking long since i cried in sch.
and i seriously didnt want to.
but my results are like so damn lousy.
i failed one third of everything,
and the rest were like, just passed.
and then i see so many ppl crying,
and then i see chunyang.
and i just cant help it le.

didnt go to band la.
cos its seriously too depressing le.
then went to watch poseidon AGAIN.
haha. we're damn lame.

i got back like, four or five papers today.
and my chem failed, as expected.
hahaha.
but the marks was better than i thought ba.
but my overall marks are gonna suck.

was talking to clar today.
and i've decided,
i'm going to be more open-minded.
i'm not going to give a damn about it anymore.
i'm going to wait things through and see how it goes,
and i'm not going to make any rash decisions.

tml got band le.
like, I HAVE TO GO BACK AGAIN!
shits.

you were the one who made all the promises.
and you were the one who broke them.
or were they just empty promises that you didnt even meant to keep.

my father just called.
and he said that if all my results hit above B4,
he'll let me spend my time however i like.
but that's like, impossible la.
somemore he dont say earlier.
wahkao.
at least then i'll work harder lorr.

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
01 love.
02 bugs.
03 ghosts.

THREE MOST ABSURD THINGS MY FRIENDS ACCUSE OF ME:
01 dunno eh.
02 seriously dunno.
03 haha. u tell me?.

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 damien.
02 wenxing.
03 and all my friends ba.

THREE PEOPLE I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT:
01 all my darlings.
02 all my dearies.
03 all my frens.

THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 being accused.
02 being lied to.
03 being alone.

THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 JAY.
02 myself.
03 my friends n my parents.

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 love.
02 studies.
03 everything.

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 wallet.
02 watch.
03 radio.

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 this survey.
02 talking to wanyi.
03 thinking about him.

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 be with him.
02 hug n kiss all my friends.
03 spend all my money.

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 cry
02 talk
03 sleep.

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 read ppl's mind
02 scream and shout
03 spend money like crazy

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 me!
02 jay.
03 whoever.

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 empty promises.
02 promises.
03 unbelievable things

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 haha.
02 funny ah.
03 go die la.

THREE OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 bubble tea.
02 pizza.
03 pasta.

THREE SHOWS I WATCHED WHEN I WERE A KID:
01 power rangers
02 la bi xiao xin
03 sailormoon.

i really dont know what you want me to do.
i dont know what you want.
i dont know what you think.
i dont even think i know you anymore.

and you wont ever know how i feel.
you cant understand what i'm going through.
i just hope things can get better between us.
i dont want to be the only one trying hard.
maybe i should just give it up.

maybe i should just forget it.
it's too damn difficult.

ytd went shopping!
haha.
spent so much money la.
i'm so broke now.

germaine came over to stay over last night.
and she's so freaking crazy can.
we two person squeeze one bed nia.
then she keep bumping into me.
cos she keep on moving and moving.

and we've decided all the details for tues le.
yay!
finally going shopping!

i'm really damn damn disappointed.
this is the fourth time le.
maybe i should just forget it ba.

exams FINALLY FINALLY over le.
haha.
so happy lorr.

the history paper was okok la.
not super difficult.
but oso not easy.
and i damn stupid.
tot both SEQ must do.
heng lats minute saw lorr.

geog sucked big time.
i didnt know all the essay questions.
and i was slping through out the whole exam.
=D.

i'm going play like crazy this few days.
cos i'm gonna be so damn dead when the results are out.
i'm gonna be killed cans.

now at some lan shop somewhere near srg.
and i got nothing to do.
haha.
all the games dunno how to play.
and i'm just doing everything that i'm doing back at home.
haha.
craps la.

maths was not as bad as i thought.
chinese was ok.
bio was a nightmare.
but 3 papers over le!.
left 4 major paper,
then it's totally HOLS.
wahahahas.

didnt slp much last night.
4 hours only.
but wasnt really studying the whole time.
think tonight will be even worse.
a maths and chem tml.
mug mug mug!

since you dont care.
i'm not going to either.
wadeva.

i cant stand myself.
i'm like, thinking about it non-stop.
and it's not helping me to study either.
it's been like, half a day le.
and i keep checking my phone non-stop,
even though it's not on silent.

and i seriously dont know what went wrong.
it's like, we were ok ytd.
but today, we're not talking anymore.

i should be studying now.
but i cant get into the study mood.
shits.

you call constantly checking on me trusting me?
you call testifying my words trusting me?
you call accusing me of lying to you when i didnt trusting me?
then you must be really crazy. or maybe i'm the one being crazy.
becos my definition of the word 'trust' is definitely different from yours.


why isit that everytime i thought we were on good terms,
you have to ruin it for me.
why is it that everytime i felt closer to you,
you have to ruin it for me.
why is it that everytime i felt like i finally love you and can relate to you,
you have to ruin it for me.
why is it that everytime you said something to me,
and mean completely different things.
why do you expect me to open up to you,
when you're not even there for me.
for more than half of my life.
i feel like i want to hate you,
but i cant.
i feel like not ever talking to you,
but i cant.
i feel like screaming and running away from home,
but i cant.
i dont even feel like i know you.


i know exams is just round the corner.
i know i'm not working hard enough.
i know i'm not being who you want me to be.
but is that enough reason for you to be screaming at me all the time.