can you feel the change that is coming.
are things going to be ever-so-different from now on.
as the days go by i just become more and more unsure.

i dont think i can handle it.

teachers day celebration started off with breakfast. we brought super a lot of food lor. couldnt even finished. and i liked the fruit cake, even though i didnt eat it. ><


me jolene and abc(hei)ngo(hei)ngo

she's damn motherly. i should learn from her seriously.

and val's just the most huggable person ever.

LIONEL! are you all shocked that he willingly took a picture with me. lol.

miss aunty.

janard! we should thank him for clearing up the table after the breakfast. =P

and the birthday birthday girl. hope you liked the jersey. :)




i managed to go back to zhs in the end! so happy please. i was pretty disappointed when jac said she's not going back anymore. but luckily ling was there! and i miss our classroom la. and the students centre is now a music room. and the indoor sports hall is finishing soon. oh man. i miss the days in zhs.

qianhui lena me and charissa.

me ling weiting. <3 lots.

now they have this notice in every classroom. cracked me up. lol.

my sunshine!

my favourite math 'teacher'!
look at the height difference betw us. oh man. i feel so short.

yama just hearts zhs so much. look at the shirt he's wearing.

bird me and liqun.

okay. i like the lighting from weiting's phone. lol.

chunyang grew!

terence! he looks kiddo right.

she sits on my right last yr! where's dinesh huh.

and lastly my favourite gossip partner mrhoyuenchi.




went to meet my darling girls after that. though ling and i reached super late cos we super didnt wanted to study. and yes, we foiled their study plans too. hahaha. so in the end we were like, talking a lot and getting nothing done. and we walked so much after diinner that my knees were starting to hurt. and we even went to the mooncake roadshow at taka. :)




and our many many attempts at phototaking was so funny. and okay. most of the pics are in the cam I THINK. go look at ling's blog for more. :)

i miss everybody so much.

i skipped school again. but NOT MY FAULT OKAY. its was raining like mad, and there was only like, four lessons today.

but i regret skipping the geog lecture. i think it'll be useful. argh.

terrible terrible cramps today. and a super big ulcer. ><
but a super noisy and nice and productive study session with knights! :)

(edit)

omg did you see the fireworks. its super duper duper duper nice to the max. its so much better and longer than the NDP one. wish i was there la. aww.
(/edited)

went for kidsread today. omg i just realised i've like, forgotten all the childhood games alr. like, i didnt even rmb how to play aeiou and simon says. wth right. ><

was supposed to meet besty at 1145 but i was early. and anw she just woke up (like, no surprise there la) so i went home first. then went out again to meet her. okay. i completed like, one tutorial assignment and i wanted to start on 9.2. but it was really hard, and i only did one of the questions cos it was the exact same question in our lecture notes. so i just copied it. and i still have to do my lit tmr.

and bums made me really depressed with his "even if i do survive i may not show it to you", i dont even know what he's being confused about and he doesnt want to tell me. hmphf. and i cant believe i almost broke down at the interchange la, totally throw my face please. but yeah, i said i wasnt going to ask for the last page of the letter alr, so im going to TRY to keep my word. cos anw i dont think i can actually give him seven good reasons.

and tunn lost her file. oh man. that'll be totally depressing if she really cant find it cos then she'll have to go and photocopy each and every one of the lecture notes and tutorials and blah blah blah.


I think we deserve people who really, really love us.
- Alicia Keys

i miss you so damn damn damn much.

i've become so reliant on gerald's digicam that i've almost forgotten how to use the camera function on my phone. i still like our backcombed hair much much better. though its really time consuming. w/o the backcombed hair it just doesnt feel right la.

and gerald's being real weird today. maybe i've really irritated him too much. >< sorry papa.

today wasnt a good day la. shouldnt even have gone to school. i want my HL milk. :(

my internet's super duper slow now. i have no idea why.

our first ever knights studying session was...okay. lol. i think for me only the last one hour was effective la. cos was playing too much before that alr. but at least i managed to finish one set of econs notes. that's quite a big accomplishment alr.

and it's germaine's birthday today! i love you girl. you're my best friend since forever. and we'll continue to be! smile on forever and ever. you know i'll always be there for you, even if we're in different schools now and we're always trying desperately to fit in breakfasts and lunches just to catch up. i love you i love you i love. :)

and yes we really need to start taking photos soon. i haven taken any pictures with you since forever.












"how come you didnt answer any of my calls or reply my messages"

"i didnt receive any"

"yeah right. you know yourself."

just f off already will you. i really want to tell you that straight in your face but then things will turn really sour. just seriously go away and dont talk to me. i dont want you in my life, not like you mattered in the first place. you're seriously seriously getting on my nerves please.





emo post ahead. (im trying to make my blog open like how i used to be okay. ><)

i was packing my drawer ytd and i came across all the letters that weirong wrote to me last time. the letters he wrote me before we were tgt, the letters when we were tgt, the letters before he went away for camps and everything, the letters after everytime we fought. it just brought back a hell lot of bittersweet memories, all the sugary moments and the angry moments and the sad moments. and it reminded me of a lot of things and moments that i've forgotten alr. and all those memories made me teared.

and i guess he really taught me a lot. making me realise that i was looking for perfection and nothing was actually perfect. like how i have a strong character and i always react before thinking, like how sometimes i made him feel neglected becos he thought i didnt place him as one of my priorities, and how i was always looking for things to fight about and how i got angry with him over the slightest things, and how i always want him to be sensitive to my feelings but never quite doing as much for him, and how every relationship needs to have love and trust and the willingness to brave the rough patches.

im just really glad that things ended off nicely betw us and we're still friends now. and even though we dont really contact that much anymore i know i can just ask you out for supper and have super long talks with you and you'll still be willing to give me advice and everything.

i really and sincerely hope that you and your girlf will be happy and in love always. :)

our first outdoor performance was good. all stunts up (although there were some hiccups along the way ><) but yes, i'm super super happy that our last training ended on such a nice note.

no more trainings for five weeks. no more reaching home damn late and feeling all the weird muscleaches in all the weird places for five weeks. no more rushing to the pt just to talk cock with the rest before training starts for five weeks. no more late friday dinners and gossiping&bitchings for five weeks.

im going to miss knights so much.

and here's like, 1/100th of the ndp photos.

i love my team. :)

my sis!


aww. arent they sweet. xD




and i just remembered bums said he read all my past posts (though i dont really believe it) and i went to read the archives again too. and i'm APPALLED at the thought of him reading everything la. my language was horrible horrible horrible and my blog posts were like, all so damn open. but then again its the innocence isnt it. i wont ever dare to write so openly and sharing my thoughts so freely now alr.

and i miss bums. happy brunei-ing. :)

im suffering from migrain now due to the lack of slp. i'll update about ndp&stayover another time when the photos are up. :)

went to meet bums for the last time before he heads off, and the movie made me cry. ><

is it dumb to want to love if you know you're going to get hurt in the end.


i hope knights will be forever this noisy and united.

im aching all over from training ytd! it totally felt like a training camp cos i think we trained for a total of like, 10 hours. i think shaun felt it could have been more productive BUT IM SERIOUSLY ACHING ALL OVER ALR. even my butt has muscleaches. how bad is that. lol. but some how i got this feeling of satisfaction from all those aches. sadistic right. and yes, it was super freaky when xinyi fainted.

and i cant believe i cried during training ytd, and for no apparent reason some more. i guess its just all the built up frustration inside la. thinking back now i felt totally totally dumb la. and its funny cos everytime the tears were going to come out alr shaun made us do handstand, so the tears flowed back in. and i was controlling damn hard. but when serene and wenyi came and asked me why my eyes were so red just couldnt control anymore. shucks. throw face like crazy. hahaha.

went to lagoon@eastcoast for dinner. the walk was superrrrrrr far i tell you. and then we had to walk back to the bus stop after dinner. -.- but hey, i realise xinyi can talk a lot too. lol.

national day today! the performance is going to be super retarded, but omgomg, fireworks with knights and then stay over. what more can i ask for.

promos up in another 40plus days.
quoted from jac baby's blog
and what am i doing? im going out everyday and playing like crazy.

i need to have more self-discipline la.

went cj after school to look for yuenchi. like, omgomg, one of the rare days that i'm actually released early. sorry knights for not planning the studying after all, its just that i've been telling yc that i'll be going since forever and in the end i always cannot make it.

and anyway we did something damn lame (we crossed a bridge) and now yuenchi says its all my fault cos he and *ahem* has some misunderstandings now. but hey hey, thank me for all those sent messages. lol. and cj has damn damn nice toilets compared to vj. and their fruit stall is simply t.h.e b.e.s.t. and yes i give you my approval! lol.

THEY HAVE ALL KINDS OF ICE BLENDED AND SMOOTHIES AND BLAH BLAH.

vj only has like, five kinds of milk shakes and they're not even (that) nice please. and yes yc has good taste cos the mango ice blend he recommended was damn nice.

and i think his bio teachers knows i crashed. he came up to us and he was like
"are you touring the school? i keep seeing you two walk around."
"is she your friend? is she your very good friend?"
"did you tell your good friend what happened last week?"

and we saw *. and i laughed like crazy a lot when i saw him. and i saw ruipeng kenley xinyun blah blah. so many ppl can.


yuenchi's shirt is freaking big.


i look freaking fugly today i dont know why. and its not even bad hair day.

went to town then bishan and yc bought basketball. and please i agree that "respect" is CHEESY. "go strong" sounds so much nicer. but he doesnt listen. sighs.

and i effing thought i lost my phone just now and i was panicking like CRAZY. and then when i was on the verge of crying i found my phone. yes, i'm super lame and careless i know. but im going to start being nice to my phone even though the battery died on me after 12 hours, and by then it was only 6 plus in the evening. shucks. (why my phone like tt! ><)

and i dont know why my earhole is bleeding. and it looks super gross with all the blood. like, i thought it healed alr! and i just refuse to take out the stud cos i know for sure its going to close back. i dont want it to bleed anymore!

and there's super long training tmr. shake head. training shouldnt even start at 11 please, like tt i have to wake up at 9 eh. i ponning sch tmr and i still have to wake up at freaking 9 oclock. damn depressing please.

top of my to buy list now: epilator. grrr. i need to save up save up save up!

i hope you like chocolate. :)

today was feeling fab@vjc. freaking retarded i think. like, okay, maybe the activities i signed up for wasnt that interesting to begin with, but its NOT fun. like, totally. and there was a freaking five hours break in betw where tunny and i went to do pw for a while. at least we (sort of) completed our part.

and it was freaking funny when we tried to climb gate out to idle that five hours away and almost got caught. and i still cant believe i actually went with them to pp when i only know like, gerald and serene there. and you know the uncle freaking hides in the bush to catch people! he's damn free i swear. and somebody (is it ade?) told me he's stationed there every morning with a camera and he takes pictures of the plants and flowers while waiting for ppl to climb gate.

and chocolate appreciation was seriously dumb. i spent the whole two hours trying to beat my high score in puzzle bobble. but i didnt managed to. super frustrating i tell you. and i think i'm more suited for the cheapo chocolate la. i cant seem to taste the difference at all.

and im going over to cj to find yuen chi tmr. hope everything goes well and turns out well. ><

I WANT TO PLAY SPARKLERS!